sure i could blame society, our culture glamorizes skinniness, we grow up playing with barbies which in my day only taught kids that dream life would include looking like a giraffe and having a pink convertible (which i still want), and now we even have michelle obamas arms as our new modern age unattainable goal. i could blame society, but what i really want to blame is medicine. i want to be skinny, not because the model in the magazine told me. i want to be skinny because i want to be an easy intubation. i want my doctors to easily see if i have jugular venous distention (a sign of right heart failure) and not miss it because you forgot to lift up my neck fat first (i felt quite stupid when my patients JV pulsation was right there, it was just underneath a roll). i dont want the medical student to hurt their back and go home with muscle spasms after spending 2 hours lifting my large leg in position for a surgery. i never want to be on the other end of a desperate plea overhead page "lifting help in OR #3".
so now my endeavor to become skinny begins. i just wish i hadnt bought that muffin. ill start tomorrow then.
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